Thinking About Divorce? Here’s What You Should Know

Divorce can be a difficult decision to make. It involves not only making the tough decision to end your marriage, but it also means dealing with complicated legal and financial matters. If you’re considering divorce, there are a few things you should keep in mind before taking the next step. We’ll explore some steps to take while considering divorce below.  

backlit beach clouds dark symbolizes woman contemplating divorce
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Consider Your Reasons for Divorce

Your spouse has checked out.

The first thing to consider is why you want a divorce in the first place. Are you having trouble communicating?   Perhaps your spouse has totally withdrawn or changed? Marriage counseling might be beneficial if your main issue is communication or other problems that can be solved with help from an outside source. Sometimes, one partner may be struggling with depression or anger issues causing difficulties in the marriage. In that case, individual therapy can help that person.  Once they are “back to themselves”, the marriage may be salvageable.   

You are a different person. 

Healthy people grow into who they are.  Some people do a lot of that growth in their twenties.  Others are late bloomers and find themselves in their 40s or 50s.  Ideally, you become your most authentic self.  Unfortunately, sometimes who you grow into no longer meshes with your spouse.  You may now want different things or have radically different world views that are not compatible. 

Make sure that you know why you want a divorce, and that it’s something you feel strongly about—not just something that seems like it would make life easier in the short-term. This is especially important if children are involve. Divorce can have a significant effect on them, and they need to know that their parents are making this decision thoughtfully and responsibly.

Preparing Yourself Emotionally

It’s no secret that getting divorced can be an emotional roller coaster. It’s important to prepare yourself emotionally before making any final decisions. Consider reaching out to a mental health professional who can provide guidance throughout this process. Having someone objective whom you can talk to can help give clarity and direction as you make this difficult decision. Additionally, make sure that you are taking care of yourself by eating healthy, exercising regularly, and spending quality time with friends and family who are supportive during this trying time.

Understand the Financial Implications of Divorce

Divorce can have long-lasting financial effects on both parties. Take some time to understand what your financial situation will look like after the split. Will one spouse stay in the home while the other moves out? If so, who will pay for what expenses? Retirement funds, child support, and other expenses and assets need to be considered, as well. Both parties can adequately prepare for post divorce life by considering all of this.

Know Your Rights Under The Law

Each state has different laws governing divorce proceedings. Make sure you understand your rights under state law before initiating a divorce proceeding—this includes issues such as property division, child custody, spousal support, and more. An experienced family law attorney can provide guidance on these matters and make sure that all of your rights are protected during the process. Some couples prefer using a mediator.  They can be more cost effective. However, you should always have a lawyer review any contract before signing it. 

Divorcing someone is never easy, but having all of the information upfront can help make it slightly less daunting of an experience. Consider your reasons for wanting a divorce carefully; understand how it could affect your finances; and know your rights under state law before proceeding with any further action. You’ll be better prepared to confidently move forward if divorce is the right course of action for you and your family, with this knowledge at hand.

Making the decision to get divorced is never easy; however, understanding what goes into deciding whether or not it is right for you can help ease some of the uncertainty around making such an important life decision. Be sure to take all necessary steps including evaluating different options, preparing yourself mentally and emotionally, exploring support networks available in your area, and seeking legal advice if needed in order to make an informed decision about whether or not divorce is right for you at this stage in life. By taking these steps prior to making any definitive decisions about getting divorced can ensure that whatever route chosen was made from an educated perspective rather than from an emotional one. 

Are you struggling in your relationship? See one of our talented therapists to get the support and clarity you need.

1 thought on “Thinking About Divorce? Here’s What You Should Know

  1. Parenting can be challenging during a divorce. Prioritize the well-being of your children and work with your ex-spouse to create a co-parenting plan that focuses on their best interests.

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